1950s – Arkham TV

Invasion Of The Saucer-Men (1957)

⭐⭐⭐ 69min Lowbrow alien invasion on a bargain budget.

Recap

So there is this bull who is loitering around lovers’ lane, mooching beer. And then there is this flying saucer. And then there are these young folks who hit an alien with their car.

Now what I wanted was a simple movie that I could watch even though I was tired, very tired. So I found this one, and it wasn’t too long, and it had this incredible creature design, so I gave it a try. And I wasn’t disappointed. Sure, it is supposed to be funny, and the humor just didn’t age well. But on the other hand there are so many corny old movies that have so much more of a following even though they are not better than this one. For example, This Island Earth is considered a SF classic by some while others enjoy it being riffed on at the MST3K. This one is shorter, more entertaining and has a clearly superior creature design. While this is in no way a classic I can not understand why I never heard of it and found it only by accident.

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Movie

Trailer

Info

youtube

imdb

Plan 9 From Outer Space (1957)

⭐⭐ 79min Aliens use Plan 9 to scare mankind. Written and directed by Ed Wood. With Tor Johnson and (in a way) Bela Lugosi.

Recap

So there are these sightings of flying saucers from outer space. As we find out, the aliens have been trying to warn mankind for months now, but to no avail. So the aliens try plan 9, which means that they raise zombies from their graves.

In the year 1980, the Medved Brothers published the book The Golden Turkey Awards to celebrate trash cinema. The most important trophy, The Worst Film Of All Time, was awarded to Plan 9 From Outer Space, and Ed Wood was awarded worst director. Oh how I wish that they had been right, but I have seen so many movies that were so much worse. Sure, the story is brainless, the acting is bad, and Wood himself didn’t even know just how unskilled he was. But maybe that is what makes him special. People like Bret Kelly or companies like Asylum are just brazen when they make trash movies for profit, while everybody seems to love Ed Wood for being the pure fool.

While this is far from being the worst movie ever, it sure is pretty bad, and it sure is fun to watch for those who love so-bad-that-it’s-good movies. And while it is bad I give it a mediocre rating including a bonus for being a historical document.

Links

Movie 78min

Trailer

Info

youtube

imdb

wiki

The Hideous Sun Demon (1958)

Old-fashioned lowbudget monster action about a guy who turns into a lizard man when exposed to sunlight. 74min imdb

Movie 74min

Trailer

Recap:

So there is this scientist who is bitten by a new radioactive isotope. From now on the sunlight temporarily reevolves him into an incredible and green lizard man. Thus he avoids the sunlight as good as he can but turns out to be quite incompetent. He kills a mobster in self defense, and what’s worse: while on the run from the police he hits a person with his car, a person who is a copper, so the homicidal monster is hunted down by coppers hungry for revenge.

What I think is interesting about this movie: four years later, in 1962, another scientist was bitten by a radioactive isotope, and from then on anger was the catalyst that temporarily turned him into an incredible and green hulk. So I like to imagine that Stan Lee has watched this movie before he invented the Incredible Hulk. This, of course, is not really probable since the Hulk was all grey in the first issues until a coloring error looked even better. Yet I cherish the thought.

Apart from that, the movie is, well, okay. I like monster horror, I like vintage movies, and if you like the same this is just right for your regular fix.

A Bucket Of Blood (1959)

A hapless artist wannabe becomes the beatniks’ darling when he covers a dead cat in clay. Directed by Roger Corman. 66min imdb

Movie 65min

Trailer

Recap:

Walter is a hapless sculptor wannabe. Good thing that he has a day job as a busboy at the beatnik joint The Yellow Door Cafe. One day he accidently kills his landlady’s cat, so he covers it with his sculpting clay and, BINGO, becomes the darling of the Boheme. Of course he now must deliver more and greater works. His boss at the Cafe soon faces a dilemma because as Walter’s agent he sure makes some profit, but he also finds out the secret behind the masterpieces.

Were the actual beatniks really as obnoxious as depicted in this movie? I wouldn’t know because I wasn’t around. It feels a bit shabby when a producer of conventional entertainment supplies makes fun of real artists. But who cares. On the one hand this movie caters to my prejudices, on the other hand it’s fun. With more effort and diligence and, yes, with more artistic skill this could have become a genuine masterpiece, but even as a cheap little lowbudget flick it’s still mighty entertaining.

(Fun (?) fact: the german title was Das Vermächtnis Des Professor Bondi “because” the german title of House Of Wax (1953) had been Das Kabinett Des Professor Bondi)

Zombies Of Mora-Tau (1957)

A crew of treasure hunters is after diamonds which are guarded by voodoo zombies. With Marjorie Eaton. 69min imdb

Movie 69min

Trailer

Recap:

So there are these treasure hunter trying to salvage diamonds from a ship that sank a long time ago. Several crews have tried this before, and they are all dead because the wreck is guarded by voodoo zombies. Two things are different this time: the crew’s diver is the love interest of the granddaughter of a zombie’s widow, and this time the old lady helps the treasure hunters. She wants to see the diamonds found and the zombie curse broken.

Well, this is a plain and simple adventure movie which uses zombies instead of natives, pirates or wild animals. It sure is not a good movie but it’s still better than most of the old zombie movies. What else? Well, in the beginning they use the term “twilight zone” two years before the TV show, and they got underwater zombies long before Shock Waves, so you can say that the film is innovative. Ach, and the grandmother indeed is played by Imperator Sheev Palpatine (don’t believe me, just search for “marjorie eaton palpatine”).

Horror Of Dracula (1958)

Classic Dracula movie directed by Terence Fisher for the Hammer Studios. With Peter Cushing and Christopher Lee. 82min imdb

(VPN:D)

Recap:

Basically, this is the battle of Grand Moff Tarkin versus Count Dooku. Spoiler: the one with the cooler Star Wars movie wins.

Okay, let me try again. This is a Dracula movie, this time Harker is a vampire hunter who tries to kill Dracula but fails, but he kills the bride of Dracula, so Dracula bites him and then goes for Lucy.

Also, this is quite an international movie: the innkeeper has a very blonde (and maybe Swedish?) maid called Inga, and the country where van Helsing resides cannot be England which shares borders only with Scotland and Wales, because in this movie they cross the border with a carriage, and along the border you see on the buildings’ walls German words like Zollamtshaus and Friederickstrasse.

All in all this is a priceless historical document. It’s such a pleasure to see skilled actors working for a skilled director, the sets are not exactly big budget but they look so much better than the nobudget stuff that is shot on location nowadays. I guess that there’s pretty much blood for a 50s movie, and I guess that the faces Lucy and Mina make when they expect Dracula may have been quite suggestive back then. Yet I must say that in my personal opinion the movie today is not as overwhelming as it may once have been. But it’s still great to watch anyway.

⭐⭐⭐⭐

War Of The Satellites (1958)

66min

(VPN:D)

Sound

English

Captions

various

Roger Corman’s quick reaction to the Sputnik fad.

Review:

The UN space program is experimenting with manned satellites, but all attempts fail. Eventually some kind of meteorite crash lands on earth, containing a warning of aliens who declare that they don’t want people like the earthlings in space and that the planet is quarantined. The satellite program is continued nonetheless, so the aliens replace the most important scientist with a shapeshifter.

Well yes, very old fashioned and quite entertaining movie by Roger Corman. Nothing special though.

⭐⭐⭐

Robot Monster (1953)

63min

(VPN:D)

Sound

English

Subs

English auto

Classic SF movie about an alien invasion that consists of one single Robot Monster.

Review:

Ro-Man, the Robot Monster eliminates almost all mankind using a death ray. Only a handful of people survive because of of a miraculous new antibiotic. Even though the survivors act very much like slashees in a horror movie, which means that they don’t stick together and run around alone again and again, Ro-Man is has a hard time trying to track them down.

Ro-Man was the first and hopefully only Robot Monster ever that consisted of a furry suit and and a diving helmet, which earned him a Golden Turkey Award for being the “Most Ridiculous Monster In Screen History”, and all in all the story is so incredibly dumb that the final plot twist should not be surprising.

Many people celebrate this movie for being so-bad-that-it’s-good, and I so totally agree.

⭐⭐⭐⭐

Cat-Women Of The Moon (1953)

Cat-Women Of The Moon 1953 64min English sound with autocaps VPN:D ⭐⭐⭐

Astronauts travel to the moon and discover that catwomen are not nekos, but normal women in catsuits.

This movie is quite bearable, even entertaining. I’m quite sure that some trash nerds will call this a cult classic, but I disagree.