Tag Archives: slasher

Blessed Are The Children (2016)

⭐⭐ 98min Indie movie that introduces the abortion topic to the slasher genre

Recap

***Spoiler Warning. No wait, is it a spoiler when I say that Jason and Michael are the slashers in Friday The 13th and Halloween? ***

So there are these three women, and one of them has two men in her life and a mother and she is pregnant. When she makes her choice she becomes the target of Anti Choicers with babyface masks who do not even pretend to be Pro Lifers and start slashing everybody who has more than one line of text.

It’s not uncommon that the slashees in slasher movies are shallow, uninteresting, daft, dull and expendable. In this one, however, they take their slasheeness to a new level. For some part of the movie I actually thought that the writer/director was an Anti Choicer himself. But then, when the slashers were portrayed as even more degenerated than the slashees, I developed an alternative theory: maybe he hates his mother (did she tell him to find a day job?), the three women represent the women who rejected him (one prefers intellectual stimulation, one prefers women, and one prefers jerks, I mean jerks that are jerky in a way that he isn’t),and the men of course represent those men who “scored” more women than he did.

Anyway, the first third of the movie is just girl talk. Think the TV show Mom, think the movie Catwoman. Yes, it’s that bad, even worse, half of the time the pregnant woman talks to herself. Then there is one third of absolute average, uninspired slashing, one almost sees the slashers yawning beneath their babyface masks. At least the last third offers a decent amount of suspense. Which means that yes, you can watch it. It’s far from being the worst slasher ever. However of course there are MANY movies that are so much better. The best reason to watch this however is its unique selling point: this is the first abortion slasher that I have heard of. So while the writer/director is not so good at writing or directing he sure isn’t too dumb when it comes to marketing. If you want to have an opinion on abortion in slasher movies I guess you will have to watch it.

Links

Movie

Trailer

Info

youtube

youtube

imdb

It’s Just A Game (2018)

⭐⭐⭐⭐ 70min. Lowbudget slasher featuring a merry band of depraved satanists.

Recap

Of course I know that the americans are weird. But this movie starts with a girl in the bathtub with her underwear on! WTF?

So there are these girls on a sleepover, and you know what it’s like: do you dare to stand in front of the mirror and say “Doofenshmirtz” three times? And since this takes place in Alabama, there are a lot of ghosts hanging in the neighborhood, like the Skull Girl from the movie poster. As Brianna, tired of being a teenager called Brianna, summons Mother Murder to kill her bully, a gang of depraved satanists rush in to save the day and the movie.

Yes, it’s true: the movie starts dumb, but eventually it becomes weird and original and entertaining. Thumbs up!

Links

Movie R

Trailer

Info

youtube

youtube

imdb

Tourist Trap (1979)

Pleasant slasher about young tourists trapped with a bunch of mannequins. 90min imdb

Recap:

So there are these young people who are stuck in a tourist trap full of mannequins, and there is this man who likes to wear a mask that makes him look and feel like a doll, and this is the beginning of a wonderful slasher movie. Oh, and we learn very soon that he has telekinetic powers.

Yes, the budget is low and it shows. There are some major logic bugs. This is not considered one of the best slashers ever for a reason. However they make the most of their budget and their skills, this one is very decent and well worth a watch.

Sure, it borrows some ideas from films like Psycho and The Texas Chain Saw Massacre, but it is also interesting to see which movies it inspired. At least for me, that is. I read that this one is about mannequins, and I thought: well, that’s neat. A movie about scary dolls. This may be nice for starters, because I soon want to take a closer look at the Full Moon Extended Universe with all the Puppetmaster and doll stuff anyway. Well, guess what, this one is produced by Charles Band, this is the inofficial start of the Bandiverse.

Movie 90min

Trailer

Rabid Grannies (1988)

Belgian black comedy about two sweet old aunties who slash their parasitic family. 89min imdb

Recap:

So there are these two rich aunties who are having a party, and everybody who wants to inherit their money shows up. The black sheep of the family however is in jail right now, so he sends a box that contains a vapor which turns the sweet old aunties into demons.

Some of the family try to escape, but they don’t get far, the others do what people always do in this kind of movies: they hide until they decide to leave their hiding places, they search for each other, they split up, and of course there is a hole lot yelling and screaming and arguing.

I am so glad that I found this one. Sure, it’s not the best movie ever: the storytelling is so choppy and so much stuff happens offscreen that I kept on thinking that maybe I was watching a butchered version. But the gore that is shown is of very good quality, and not all, but part of the comedy stuff works well. I believe that they knew very well what they were doing. They knew that they couldn’t make a really great move, so they decided to make a nice little black comedy that would find its audience despite its flaws, and it worked.

This movie has passed the test of time and is very enjoyable even today.

Movie 90min

Trailer

The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974)

Most legendary slasher movie ever. Directed and co-written by Tobe Hooper. 83min imdb

Recap:

In Muerto County there is an especially vile case of grave robbery, so the siblings Sally and Franklin go there to look after their grandfather’s grave, along with three friends. On their way back they decide to stop the grandfather’s house, and Pam and Kirk want to swim.

In the past I have only watched a family friendly edit of this. Now for the first time I saw the full 83min and I must say that I am most impressed. This is one of best horror movies ever. There is almost no runtime padding except for some dialog among the main characters which really helps no one. The rest of the movie strictly serves the story, with the parts summing up to a whole so perfectly as they usually don’t, especially not in slasher movies. And Hooper himself, surely not the worst in the industry, never managed to do something quite like this ever again. Which of course is cool. With this one masterpiece he is ahead of most writers and directors, including many blockbuster makers.

Reminder

In the comment section they say that this doesn’t work in USA and Canada, so in case of doubt please pick a german server for your VPN.

Movie 83min

Trailer

and then some extra footage

Not Hooper’s best work, but the song is a timeless classic.

Sleepaway Camp 2 (1988)

Sleepaway Camp 2: Unhappy Campers

Careless fun summer slasher. 80min imdb

Movie 80min

Trailer

Recap:

The movie starts with some campers telling horror stories. We get a recap of part one, plus we are told that the slasher a) has spent some years at the madhouse and b) has undergone plastic surgery and c) has been set free recently. Then we are shown that the slasher d) is working at this camp as a counselor and e) continues slashing.

So they don’t waste time and get the movie going right away. What follows is routine slashing, and it’s performed quite casually. One might say that slashing is more enjoyable when the slasher does his job with earnest dedication, but this more tongue-in-cheek approach works, in my opinion, quite well, too. The murders themselves are partly routine stuff, but mostly fun and original, and there is a decent amount of gratuitous nudity and sex. So as long as you don’t ask how the victims’ disappearances could be covered up with lies without someone actually missing them for such a long time, you have a very decent fun slasher. By no means it’s special, but it very okay and watchable.

Sleepaway Camp (1983)

Foster siblings Angela and Ricky go to summer camp. And summer camp just wouldn’t be the same without some decent slasher shenanigans. 84min imdb

Movie 84min

Trailer

Recap

So the movie starts with a freak motorboat accident, killing a family except for one child, which now is sent to grow up at the aunt’s place.

Years later, cousins and now foster siblings Angela and Ricky go to summer camp. There, people who interact with Angela have not much of a life expectancy. The first victim indeed is a pedo rapist, but then the reasons for the killings become more and more arbitrary.

In the end there is a plot twist, maybe to explain why the killer is insane and/or maybe to gross out the audience and/or to add a detail to make this movie stand out, to make it “different” and “special”. To me, this twist seemed rather forced and there is nothing really “special” about this movie. But it’s really a well done and above average slasher that deserved its success both when it comes to the profit it made and to the sequels which I will sure give a try.

More

Head (2015)

Conventional slasher story about happy campers at the site of vicious murders, diligently filmed by nerds who love to play with puppets. 61min imdb

Movie 62min

Trailer

Recap:

So there are five young people camping in the forest where they meet a sixth one who tells them that this was the site of gory murders a few years ago. When they finally decide to leave, they find out that they no longer have cars.

So all in all it is a very conventional slasher story. But that in itself is not a big problem. We are used to conventional slasher stories. We are happy if there is something new, something original about them, or if they are extremely well done, or if they at least don’t totally suck. And guess what, we have a winner. This one is done by people who love what they do, and what they do is playing with puppets. And this is enough to make a conventional slasher story look fresh and new and interesting. Of course it’s not scary, not a bit, but it’s fun. I want more.

Criminally Insane (1975)

Fat Ethel slashes everybody who gets between her and the fridge. 61min imdb

Movie 61min

Trailer

Recap

So there is Ethel, she has mental problems, so she gets shock treatment. Unlike her quack she knows that electroshocks don’t work, she prefers eating. Her grandmother is the first one to try to get between Ethel and the food. It doesn’t end well.

For me, watching this movie was a dare, because it’s marketed as a bad taste exploitation slasher comedy, the worst of the worst, making fun of the fat, yadda yadda yadda yadda, you must feel the subconscious need to punish yourself to switch on a movie like this. But guess what, I have seen worse. In a way, this really is a movie. The storytelling, the cinematography, the editing, all this is done as if they really tried to make an actual movie, and Youtube channels that make money with commercial breaks are uploading several turds every day which are so much worse.

I didn’t read too many of the reviews, but I bet that there are people who will tell you that this is indeed a tragedy and that Ethel and her sister are some metaphorical hyperbole analogies or whatever for our constant and futile struggle with reality. Of course they are wrong, this is a piece of trash and not a piece of art after all. But at least they are closer to the truth than those who accuse this movie of fatshaming or whatever. It is what it is. It’s not a good movie, but it’s a good thing that I watched it.

X-ray (1981)

While receiving a routine check-up, a woman finds herself stranded on the hospital’s eighth floor, while someone dressed as a doctor is intent on her never leaving, even if it means killing any staff member who comes into contact with her. 89min imdb

Movie 89min age restricted

Trailer

Recap:

This is the official imdb summary:
“While receiving a routine check-up, a woman finds herself stranded on the hospital’s eighth floor, while someone dressed as a doctor is intent on her never leaving, even if it means killing any staff member who comes into contact with her.”

And well, yes, the description is accurate. I was naive, so full of wishful thinking, I was really hoping for a serious dose of psychological hospital horror, complete with mind games and power games and what have you. And in a way, that’s what I got, just not in the way I expected. In the opening credits they say that this is a Golan-Globus production, which is a huge red flag if you have ever seen Superman 4 or even an episode of the never ending Lemon Popsicle franchise.

But then, big surprise, while the movie was so totally not what I was hoping for, it turned out to be a really decent slasher. Some of the murders are really good, some scenes are pleasently absurd, there are even some big and bizarre laughs in it.

This is not arthouse, nor is it Oscar material, it is not a cinema treasure full of images that were never seen before. But it’s fun, it’s just what you want to see when you pick a horror movie. And I like it.

Trick (2019)

It’s that time of the year when the slashers come out, and Trick keeps on coming up with new, well, ideas. 100min imdb

Movie 96min

Trailer

Recap:

So there’s this guy whose name is Patrick “Trick” Weaver or maybe not, because it may very well be that he casually switches identities whenever he sees fit. One evening he poops a Halloween party by killing pretty much every guest before he gets hit himself. He gets emergency surgery and survives, escapes, falls out of the window, survives and disappears, probably by jumping into the river, which of course means certain death, doesn’t it? Everybody except for one single cop believes that he’s dead, and that’s why everybody except for one cop is surprised that there are more Halloween party massacres in the following years. However, the slasher seems to think that his strategy does not draw enough attention, so one year he starts cop killing during the week before Halloween.

I say that the first Halloween party massacre was a good way to start the slasher movie, the bit with the cop who is the only one who believes in his theory is not new, but good enough to work for this movie, and some of the the cop killings are quite innovative. Then however, there is the Finale, and I think that it is not as good as it is long, and when there is the surprising plot twist, I did not foresee it, but at that point I just didn’t care anymore.

This movie sure is okay. Not really good, but I have seen much worse, and it surely is an adequate choice for a holiday related movie night.

Bunni (2013)

Entertaining slasher for the Halloween season. 71min imdb

(VPN:D) this is the 71min version. The 73min version cannot be embedded, so there is a direct link in the picture to the left.

Review:

It’s Helloween, and two couples of twenty somethings are loitering in front of the old, abandoned novelty shop. An old man warns them that this place is haunted, so they burgle it right away. The first jumpscare, of course, is just a joke, the slashing doesn’t start before a few minutes later.


The first half our is dedicated to the exposition, the shorter part is about the slasher’s origin, the longer part is about the characterisation of Rick The Prick. Why? Because! He definitely is not the center of the movie, but his part is played by the writer/editor/director of the movie who obviously enjoyed being the dude with the infinite amount of girlfriends. I think that with half an hour this is a pretty long exposition, especially since the movie has according to imdb and filmstarts.de an official runtime of 60min. Which makes me wonder because the youtube edit has a lengthy mid credit scene.

Anyway, is it good or not so? I’ll say it’s okay. It’s got no surprising plot twists, and it’s not new or special or anything, but it’s very decent holiday related binge material.

⭐⭐⭐